Good evening everyone and welcome to today’s Top Ten Tuesday post!
In my Sunday Summary post last week I told you that I was planning on sharing this particular post, but that I hadn’t chosen a theme. I’ve looked at a plethora of quotes saved on my goodreads account and on my kindle and I’ve decided to share my top ten humorous quotes with you.
There is a definite weighting to a particular author I have read a lot of books by. He is very funny and the book series these come from is satirical, so it’s unsurprising so many have come from it. Yet a lot of them have a ring of truth, which to my mind makes me even funnier!
I hope you enjoyed today’s post and the quotes I share below – here are the quotes and the books they belong to: –
People ought to think for themselves, Captain Vimes says. The problem is, people only think for themselves if you tell them to.
Men At Arms – Terry Pratchett
“I told Lord Harms I’d return Steris to him. And I will. That is that.”
“Then I will remain and help,” Marasi said. “That is that.”
“And I could really use some food,” Wayne added. “Fat is fat.”
The Alloy of Law – Brandon Sanderson
Granny Weatherwax made a great play of her independence and self-reliance. But the point about that kind of stuff was that you needed someone around to be proudly independent and self-reliant at. People who didn’t need people needed people around to know that they were the kind of people who didn’t need people.
Maskerade – Terry Pratchett
Never throw the first punch. If you have to throw the second, try to make sure they don’t get up for a third.
Steelheart – Brandon Sanderson
The research shows that groups of friends who allow members to disagree and still be friends are more likely to come to better decisions. So the next time you are in a group of people trying to reach consensus, be the asshole. Every group needs one, and it might as well be you.
You Are Not So Smart – David McRaney
It was clearly the room of a woman, but one who had cheerfully and without any silly moping been getting on with her life while all that soppy romance stuff had been happening to other people somewhere else, and been jolly grateful that she had her health.
Guards Guards – Terry Pratchett
The thing about the path less travelled is that it is often less travelled for a good reason.
King of Thorns
The conversation of human beings seldom interested him, but it crossed his mind that the males and females always got along best when neither actually listened fully to what the other one was saying.
Pyramids – Terry Pratchett
There were some things on which even they were united. No more policy statements, no more consultative documents, no more morale-boosting messages to all staff. This was Hell, but you had to draw the line somewhere.
Eric – Terry Pratchett
Listen,’ said Granny Weatherwax. ‘She’s well out of it, d’you hear? She’ll be a lot happier as a queen!’
‘I never said nothing,’ said Nanny Ogg mildly. ‘
I know you never! I could hear you not saying anything! You’ve got the loudest silences I ever did hear from anyone who wasn’t dead!’
Lords and Ladies – Terry Pratchett
That’s my Top Ten Tuesday post! Which of these quotes did you find the funniest? Let me know in the comments!